Thinking

So I’ve been thinking alot about life and decicisons I’ve made in them. I’m 31 and 10 years ago I could have swarn my life were going to be in a different spot. I would have swarn I would be in ministry, starting my own church. So much time has passed and so much has changed that I don’t even recognize those dreams anymore. I used to be so focused on the “Power of God” prayed the prayer that many still do, “show them your power God”. I was convinced that if people just saw the power of God it would be what brought them over to His side.

Years passed trials and struggles and God brought, and indeed lead me through a series of difficult trials, when I realized that the power of God is much smaller in its true power to the Love of God. The Bible discribes God as a God of Love. Its such a warm fuzy thought but many “christians” don’t even know the true meaning of that description. A God who’s love is so long it never falls short. A God who’s love is so deep that it cannot even be imagined. Its not a lofty love that sits above the clouds and wishes you well with a quick prayer when you cannot meat your bills or your so down and sad that your thoughts are consumed by the personal pain you feel, left alone in a world of solitude where only you exist. God is the guy who empties his pockets to help you have food, or who stays up 4 days by your side in your world of solitude and sadness that you can’t escape, His arms held around you and His eyes filled with tears at your pain. Every step going through it all with you and at your side.

But I lead myself to ask what people’s true image of God is. Do they really go to church on Sunday and wednessday and think as long as they fill the plate and pass it along that, “this indeed is the love of God”. Is a God who answers all your prayers of I want and give me health and wealth really the God that anyone wants, a far and distant God who only answers with items to keep you quiet. Do these people walk along dark roads at night as if with a friend and empty their heart to God their first love and Best friend. When the day is too much, and the pain is too deep, and the stress overwhelms through the migranes and pain, do they reach deep and side and stow themselves against the Protecting wall of Love that Is God. Do they reach out for them when the days are darkest and not just the early morning dawn? Is He the begining and end of their days and nights and of their life as well?

Is His love so flowing to them that they seek only to bless others with it. Reaching out to give even just the smallest portion back of what they have received even though they know it will never compare to the Love they’ve been shown?

Last time I went to Mount Hope church in Lansing, MI. I stepped away from my wife for a moment. A man came up to my wife and asked why she didn’t nudge me to give my life to Christ. She asked why, and he said “well the tattos and long hair he’s obvioulsy in need…” She of course was quick to correct him. I found out about this only a few days ago though it happened a while ago. However I am not the only one to go through incidents like this. Coworkers, friends, and strangers who’ve shared stories alike all have relayed these things to me, and they bring me to the questions, does the “christian church” really understand what Love is? If they don’t walk in a loving step toward their brother, can they really understand or have experienced the Love of God that overwhelms the very breath of life?
Just more thoughts.

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One Response to Thinking

  1. Kukrisan says:

    damn man this is sum hard core stuff here i had no idea as to who you really are buy playing with you and talking to you on wow, but i now have a better understanding about you. I would not have pictured you with long hair and tats man. i am shure i can speak for a lot of people when i say that i too can relate to stuff like this on a certain lvl. This stuff rocks man. peace.

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